APRIL FOOL'S DAY

Everyday is considered fool's day, everyone has their own share of foolishness.

It is just a matter of how you deal with every situation that is one way or another making you feel that you've been fooled and how to also make a fool out of someone.

After all the tragedies that I've been through there came a point when I needed to play

"The Game of Fools"

It started when I met someone lately who I thought can make me fall inlove again, I didn't like her physically at first, but when we had a chance to "know each other" I somehow felt satisfied in a moment. I tried to convince myself to like her deeply but there was something in her and the things that she did made me fear that I would not be able to get out of that "relationship" if it'll keeps on goin on. With the help of my colleagues, at the moment that we were "knowing each other", something suddenly just strucked me and made me decide rightaway to end up whatever "relationship" we may have...She got mad at me because she thought that I was for real, but I wasn't.

AND THAT WAS AN EXAMPLE OF ME MAKING A FOOL OUT OF HER!

Then came another women who I suppose to have known way back but just didn't have the chance to...

We met at a bar with some common friends. I felt excited seeing her finally after missing lots of chances before. As expected, they tried to hook me up with her which ended up successfully. We had a chance to "know each other" that same night that I met her. She was sweet and charming but there was something in her that was lacking when it comes to "knowing each other". Days have passed and we managed to have a constant communication and there were several times that she visited me at my place. I felt comfortable whenever she would sleep beside me, but she was really not fond of doing "knowing each other" activities. My colleagues would tell me that it's better if she's sweet 'coz I could atleast feel the sincerity, which made me decide to pursue her. Unfortunately, she keeps on telling me that she is still not ready for a more serious relationship. I tried to understand her and thought that she just needed more time know me better. Days came by... she no longer texted me, responded to my texts and emails...I thought she was for real, but she isn't.

AND THIS WAS AN EXAMPLE OF ME BEING FOOLED!

Another month has passed,

relationships were broken,

laughters were shared,

happy memories were cherished,

but at the end of the day, there is still emptiness

that i feel inside of me.

Nothing and no one could ever compare to the happiness and satisfaction that I've felt when I was still with Yhen. People would tell me to move on, there were alot of distractions along the way but after everything, I still feel that something is missing.

Every single day that is passing by is another day of longing... hoping to seeing her again...

Is there really existence after death? would we see each other again if I die? Would she know me still? Would I feel her again?... I can no longer fight this battle of melancholy, seems that I can't get out of this...